Nothing Ever Felt So Right
by Kuroida
Summary: The hospital scene with Lupin and Tonks in HBP needs a bit more to it don't you think? even though there's like a million of these I feel like I must contribute Oneshot. RL/NT


I've had this idea for YEARS. Just never got the chance to write it out but then english assigned a "short story assignment" and my teacher said I'm allowed to take another story and modify it and thus this was born (finally, english class is good for SOMETHING). The best thing is I can just tell everyone that it's for homework :P

Anyways, the first part is right out of the book.

Hope you enjoy!

I've had this idea for YEARS. Just never got the chance to write it out but then english assigned a "short story assignment" and my teacher said I'm allowed to take another story and modify it and thus this was born (finally, english class is good for SOMETHING). The best thing is I can just tell everyone that it's for homework :P

Anyways, the first part is right out of the book.

Hope you enjoy!

* * *

"You see?" said a strained voice. Tonks was glaring at Lupin.

"She still wants to marry him, even though he's been bitten! She doesn't care!"

"It's different," said Lupin, barely moving his lips and looking suddenly tense. "Bill will not be a full werewolf. The cases are completely-"

"But I don't care either, I don't care!" said Tonks.

"And I've told you a million times," said Lupin, refusing to meet her eyes, staring at the floor, "that I am too old for you, too poor...too dangerous..."

* * *

"Then say you don't care for me! Say you don't love me! Just say it Remus!" Tonks shouted, tears threatening to pour down her face but eyes sharp with anger.

Remus took a step back, surprised at the outburst.

"I- but- Tonks please," he said, trying to reason with her.

_"Not in front of everyone! What would the children think!"_

Remus' eyes quickly scanned the room; _everyone _was looking at them now. Of course they would, they were witnessing an emotional breakdown of one Nymphadora Tonks.

"Say it Remus!" Tonks said, grabbing the front of his robes and forcing Lupin out of his thoughts. "I can't stand this anymore! You avoid me; you keep telling me all these things that I've heard a million times before! I don't even know what I'm supposed to feel! So just say it Remus and I can finally move on with my life! I can't stand not knowing! Say you don't love me!" Tonks spat out and Remus' mind spun.

Was all this really necessary? Honestly, they were in the middle of a crowded Hospital Wing for crying out loud!

He took another step back but Tonks held him firmly by the robes and he looked into her eyes. Those eyes were full of pain; a suffocating mix of sadness and frustration and Remus felt like he was drowning.

What was he supposed to say? Yes would mean dragging her into his life. He was a _werewolf,_ dangerous and shunned by the rest of society. He wouldn't be able to bear having that weight pushed onto the one person that meant the world to him...and yet, no would mean losing that same person. Tonks was the first and probably the last person in his life who loved him for who he really was.

Remus' head swam with everything he had told her countless time before; to keep Tonks away from him; away from harm.

_"You love her."_

Part of his mind told him only for Remus to agree. Yes, he loved her; it was _because _he loved her that he pushed her away. She deserved someone better, someone who could support her needs and protect her. Not someone who was the total opposite. Remus told himself that was doing this for her own good; he always had been for he couldn't bear to see her hurt. Yet, when he looked into her eyes something inside him spoke:

_"But you're hurting her now."_

His mind was battling with his heart, he was stuck between what he really wanted and what he knew he couldn't; _shouldn't_ have. Strange really, the more he wanted something the harder his mind tried to convince him that he didn't deserve it.

"I- Tonks, I – please- everyone..." he stuttered lamely before giving the woman in front of him a pleading look. Unfortunately for him, Tonks must have misinterpreted his look as one of rejection and with a cry of rage and sorrow she threw down the edges of his robes and pushed him out of her way.

"Forget it Lupin!" she screamed at him before marching off past him for the door and in that split second Remus had made up his mind. Everyone was staring at them, Hermione looked close to tears and Ron's mouth was probably hanging open but he didn't care anymore. He was letting the one person that he cared about more than anything else in the world just slip through his fingers. If Tonks walked through that door she was gone and he'd never know where this path would lead. He wouldn't be able to stand that, his heart would break.

"No," he said, loudly and clearly and everyone's attention was turned back to him. Remus ignored the eyes, he was focused on one person and one person only. He moved before he even knew what he was doing, grabbing Tonks' arm before she could walk out of his life forever.

Tonks stopped, mid step and slowly turned around to look at him and all of Remus' courage suddenly vanished. Tonks' eyes weren't angry anymore, they were dead. It shattered the warmth and confidence Remus had felt only moments ago and Remus suddenly realized that he couldn't meet them.

Thus preceded the longest and most awkward silence of Remus' life. What was he supposed to say? What could he possible say to make Tonks forgive him for being a miserable git for the past year?

Nothing.

And Remus' body moved before his mind even could even process what he was doing.

He was pulling Tonks closer, close enough to hold her fully in his arms. He couldn't back out now and, closing his eyes, he leaned in and their lips met. Remus Lupin was kissing Nymphadora Tonks right smack in the middle of the Hogwarts hospital wing for if words won't work, actions should right?

The kiss was soft yet hard; fiery yet cool and Remus poured his heart out into it. A split second later and, to his relief, he felt the lips against his kiss back. He kept his eyes closed; otherwise sheer embarrassment would force him to stop. He'd only get one chance at this and in that split second that seemed like forever, Remus felt whole. He'd done the right thing.

When Remus pulled back, he still couldn't meet Tonks' eyes. Instead he heaved a sigh and rested his forehead against hers, eyes still closed.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled to her softly.

"I'm sorry. Please don't cry."

Tonks seemed to relax slightly from under him and again without thinking he wrapped his arms around her. Strange, it seemed like his brain had gone on a vacation right about now. That or, for once, it was actually agreeing with his heart.

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted when a hand suddenly came up to clutch the front of his shirt.

"Remus John Lupin you are a miserable, old, pathetic git and I'll cry as much as I damn feel like," Tonks tells him, head still buried in his chest and Remus can't help it; he grins.

And when he opens his eyes he realizes the rest of the room is grinning as well. Mrs. Weasley, ever the emotional one, is crying tears of joy with a large smile on her face and Remus can feel his face getting hot once again. They should have taken this outside but Tonks is running her hands through his hair and pushing his head down and Remus finds the courage to finally look into her eyes.

He realizes he's never said it. Never said those immortal three words but he guesses that's alright. Her eyes say it all and he hopes his eyes do too. Some words aren't meant to be spoken yet and he thinks this is a situation where words aren't needed.

There's a war going on, they're in the middle of a crowded room with an injured occupant and his best friend's _son_ is watching them but that doesn't matter. Nothing matters right now except for the person he's holding in his arms and as their lips touch once more and the room bursts into applause, his mind and heart draw out one conclusion:

Nothing ever felt so right.

* * *

After this I think I'll stick with friendship and adventure stories (you have wno idea how hard it is to just describe one stupid kiss...and I don't think it turned out that great in the end since I kinda just gave up...)

So, how is it? Passable? :P I need to make sure that someone ho has never read Harry Potter before in their life still gets what's going on...

REVIEWS PLEASE!

Updated cuz I had some major tense problems going on :S


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